When there are multiple handlers at home like grandparents and parents, often there is confusion in home rules. Multi-generational upbringing is tricky and needs to be handled with care and keeping the child’s well being at heart.
Grandparents come from wisdom and experience but parents bring new-age thinking and exposure to the child. There are differences of opinion in what should be fed, what is healthy, how much tv he/she watches, homework time. There’s also softer skills like love, respect, empathy and responsibility which need to be imbibed from the home environment.
So in a home where there are many opinions, are the opinions coming out of a democracy or are they coming out of situations and seats of power ?
A good practice is democracy, a feeling of freedom and oneness amongst the family. The family needs to sit in a moment of calm and discuss home rules, iron out issues and present one set of rules to the children. These should also reflect what the child wants, which is an important voice to factor in. This can be done in a family circle time where everyone shares their difficulties and arrive at a solution. A deep meaningful discussion like this also helps the child absorb the fact that all voices are relevant, vis-a-vis getting the sense that rules are made in an autocratic fashion.
There will always be as many opinions as there are people, and therefore it is best to leverage these multiple voices and come through in a chorus rather than cacophony.